Career & The City

(If you haven't already read part one of this series, where I detail the story of my layoff, please click here to check it out!)

There's no doubt that getting laid off was a shock to my system. At first it didn't even seem real. I felt as though any moment I'd wake up from this crazy dream and be right back where I started.

But as the days and weeks passed by, as I completed my 30-day "transition" at work and no longer had to report to the office, the reality of my situation sank in, and so did the confusion.

You know how when you stand on a dock overlooking the ocean, it appears that the water just continues on forever? Well, that's sort of how it feels to lose your job and not really know what step to take next. Of course, your life situation will predicate some of your choices (obviously if you have a family to support, you'll be in a different position than I was), but for me, it felt as though there were limitless possibilities of what I could do next. That's a liberating thought, but also a terrifying one.

I had been following a path, even if it had been the wrong path in many ways, for the last 10 years, and even though there were twists and turns, I had never strayed too far from the road. Now, I had a paintbrush in my hand, and only I could decide whether to continue painting or start on an empty canvas.

They (whoever "they" are) say that in these traumatic moments, you begin to take inventory of yourself, and often when you do this in earnest, you find you aren't the same person you once thought you were. We spend so little time in introspection, pushing away or ignoring our emotions, wants, needs and desires, that when we make these punctuated attempts, it can be startling to notice just how much has changed.

This was very much the case for me. A deep, strong desire within me was calling for me to work from home, to find a career with innate flexibility and to operate, as much as possible, on my own terms. I was sick and tired of marketing -- I no longer found it inspirational or challenging, and the thought of returning to yet another job in this field gave me pangs of anxiety. I knew I had always wanted to be an entrepreneur, but I had never, ever been able to figure out what kind of business I'd want to run. I found myself dancing around in circles trying to piece together all of these thoughts, while not forgetting the reality that I needed to work, and ultimately I'd end up so frustrated that I'd just push it all away.

Then I remembered career coaching. And not in the, "Oh, this is what I want to do with my life" vein, but in the, "Oh there are actually people out there specifically trained to get me out of this funk" way. As a Harvard Business School alumna, I got access to three complimentary sessions with a career coach, and I soon discovered that as a SoFi member, I also had access to a coach. I took advantage of both, figuring that in my uber-confused state, I'd need as much help as I could get.

My HBS coach, Jill, wound up being a life changer. At first, she sent me a few worksheets that were exceedingly frustrating to fill out. All she was asking me to do was to identify things I liked and didn't like about my past jobs, or things I wanted from a new job. And yet the intense fear of listening to my own gut instincts paralyzed me. It took weeks of staring at those papers before I gained the courage to actually write something down. Even then, things were clear as mud.

I remember getting on the phone with Jill for our second session, completely fed up with myself. I had spent (what felt like) hours working on the assignments she'd given me, and all I could come up with was that I liked to write, give speeches/presentations, solve problems and help other people. But looking at those, I saw four distinct skills, not a job category.

Then she said the magic words: "Have you ever thought of becoming a career coach? I think you might really enjoy it."

I hadn't. Not once. And yet, upon further examination of my past, we saw that so many signs pointed to this line of work. I had signed up as a career counselor and advisor on two online "helping" platforms, and had loved reviewing people's resumes and doing mock interviews. I had relished the chance to lead the recruiting process for Disney Vacation Club's professional interns for nearly three years, working hand-in-hand with HR to find resumes, interview candidates and onboard the newbies. At Capital One, I had wanted nothing more than to be a people manager, and when I successfully recruited two all-star candidates, I was quickly the go-to person on the team for help with hiring. When I looked back on my corporate experience, it wasn't the marketing accolades that I remembered, but the impact I had on the growth and development of others.

If I'm being honest, it's not like discovering these things suddenly made everything fall into place and make perfect sense. But what it did do was give me a kernel of hope. It showed me a) that there was value in my skill set, and b) that there were possibilities for fulfilling work beyond what I had been doing for the last decade. And at that stage, the hope that this inspired meant everything.

I was laid off on September 7, 2015, and on November 15, 2015, I hit publish on my website. Was my business perfect? Did I have every piece in place and feel uber confident that I'd sell out in a month? Absolutely not (and if I'm honest, being an entrepreneur is a never-ending process of growth and change). What I did know was that, for the first time in my life, I was laying the groundwork for the future of my career, cement and bricks in my own two hands. And the excitement and exhilaration of pursuing something so bold was a feeling I'd never quite felt before. Walking into the unknown, and continuing to forge my own path, is the scariest thing I've ever done. Yet I wouldn't trade the experience for the world.

(If you'd like to learn more about career coaching and how the process might be beneficial for your job search, feel free to grab a free, 30-minute consultation with me. I'd love to learn more about your challenges and discuss how we might work together to move you through them!)

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Gabrielle "Gabby" Bill is a career coach and consultant who believes everyone should be working in a job that leaves them feeling fulfilled. She coaches groups and individuals through a reflection process, uncovering often hidden motivations, values, goals and skills as they relate to their career. These reflections are then parlayed into concrete action plans to guide clients through the process of finding, creating and landing their dream jobs. You can learn more about her services by visiting www.gabriellebill.com.

As much as it's hard sometimes, I do truly believe that everything happens for a reason. And in 2009, I think I was just meant to be in Washington, D.C. so that I could meet and befriend Amy Oyekunle.

The two of us were spending our summers working for The Global Fund for Children -- I was their first MBA intern, working on marketing strategies for their children's books division, and Amy was their first international fellow for adolescents and girls, hailing all the way from Nigeria, where she left her husband and two young children behind. The job was a challenge, but our friendship was easy. I attacked Amy with my effervescent drive to conquer the city in the short 12 weeks I was there, and she, a first-time visitor to the U.S., was more than happy to be my partner in crime.

Over the course of those few short months, I learned a tremendous amount about Amy, and when I left D.C., not knowing when or if I'd ever see her again, I cried at the thought. You see, in our short time together Amy taught me so much about life, about creating your own personal definition of success and about the importance of dedicating your time to making the world a better place.

Growing up in West Africa, Amy realized from a very early age that the women and girls in her community were treated differently. She recalls the many times she was told she "couldn't" do things -- like climb a tree -- because she was a girl, or the times she "should" do things simply because she was.

"I want to be in the kitchen because I love to be in the kitchen, not because I'm a girl," she says.

And yet, even though she knew that fighting for women was her passion, she still struggled to find her way into the field, in part due to heavy parental influences guiding her in different directions.

"My mom always said I should be a lawyer. My dad wanted me to be a medical doctor. The problem was that I hated science!"

Even after pursuing a sociology degree at university -- a decision Amy credits with solidifying her fascination with women and women's issues -- her father paid for her to pursue an MBA at Leeds University. Shortly after arriving, she changed to a development studies course, much to his chagrin.

"[I realized] life is too short to do things because other people want you to do them," she says. At Leeds, "I heard the word 'feminist' for the first time. I met well-known feminists...people who identified with other sexualities. [I learned] there’s a totally different world outside of where I come from where it’s possible for women to be fulfilled and have it all. I wanted women to have it all. I wanted to have it all."

In 2005, Amy joined an organization called KIND (the Kudirat Initiative for Democracy), a non-profit dedicated to empowering women, eradicating violence against them and encouraging their full participation in the social, political and economic landscape of Africa.

"The work was awesome," she says. "I was able to take all of that pent up frustration about what women can do and can’t do, and joined a network of women that can do everything."

In her work she began training other young women (some as young as 14) in high schools and universities. Her work taught them leadership skills, educated them on fundamental rights, and taught them about sexuality- and reproductive health, including the "radical" idea that their body was their own.

"We connected them with young leaders of tomorrow. I was working to liberate others, and [in the process], I was being liberated in so many ways."

In 2008, Amy was promoted to Executive Director of KIND, a tremendous honor given her young age, and a year later, was awarded the fellowship that brought her to the U.S.

"The Global Fund for Children was the first organization to fund a program KIND was developing for younger girls," she says. "Then to have the opportunity to come to the U.S. and learn about the dynamics of donors, how they think, what they think, what they know or don’t know.... It was wonderful. I came back reinvigorated to do much more."

But her trip to the U.S. taught her more than just hard skills that would advance her work in Africa.

"Seeing how things operated in the U.S. where everybody was treated equally changed my way of working. I didn’t like feedback before I left, but now I was finding ways to solicit it. All of a sudden I saw the importance of spending time with co-workers, team building, going out as a team. When I came back I was a different boss."

And while these newfound thoughts about leadership, teamwork and driving impact helped Amy make strides in her Executive Director role, they also created a chasm...one that widened over time.

Like many non-profits, KIND was constantly on the hunt for money to fuel their programs and goals, and when their fundraising efforts proved challenging, it meant that change efforts stalled or never happened at all. After a while, this frustrated Amy.

"[I kept asking myself,] 'Are we making the impact? Am I doing what’s true to myself?' I want to help women and girls change things. [As an organization] I didn’t feel like we were dealing with the real structural problems that would allow us to make that happen."

So she quit.

"I was afraid," she says. "I wanted financial independence, wanted to be a successful woman who had a family going on well, a job going on well. That’s what was important. I thought. But then I realized what I really wanted was to fulfill my own dreams, not someone else’s."

Rather than apply for other full-time roles, Amy started her own consulting business focused on women’s empowerment, NGO management and development work. She works for donor partners who want short-term consultancies to evaluate a program or design one for girls and child protection. In the last year, she's managed to recruit five clients, a workload that fills her to the brim. And she's never been happier.

“It’s mine!” she exclaims. “I hold myself to a different standard. A higher standard. I think I’m able to accomplish much more than when I was bowing down to someone or waiting for authorization or confirmation. I make decisions, and I deal with the consequences as they come. I can take off time to be with my family. I can make time for what I think is important to me.”

And to what does Amy attribute to all of her success?

"I researched a lot," she says. "I looked on LinkedIn to find examples of other people doing this work, and I realized, 'Hey, I can do that, oh I’ve done that." I did a lot of consultations, talking to people to find out the pitfalls, challenges, how to price myself."

She also focuses on the power of word of mouth and in using a great work product to inspire repeat business. "If you do a good job they will call you back for future work," she says. "It's about becoming well known in the community."

Today, Amy's once more fulfilled by the work she does and the change she can drive in her community.

"I'm still a work in progress," she admits with a chuckle. But so are we all.

If you'd like to connect with Amy or learn more about her work, you can send her a LinkedIn connection request.

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Careers can be a lot like dating.

It all starts with courting.
You're assessing potential employers, trying to see how many qualities they have that you can "check off" your list. Then you pitch yourself to them, crossing your fingers that they see only your best qualities (because that's all you're showing them, of course).

Then the first date.
BAM! You've scored an interview. Your palms are a bit sweaty. You've rehearsed some small talk, just in case there's awkward silence. When you leave, you just know your interviewer is going to talk about you to their friends...you just hope they're saying nice things.

The terrible, horrible wait.
The three-day text rule is unbearable. You want to call and ask for an update, but don't want to seem clingy or desperate. Then just when you can't bear it anymore, your phone buzzes! You got the job!

The honeymoon.
Your first day is great. Meeting your teammates is like going to a non-awkward family dinner where everyone loves you and wants to talk to you. Every assignment is new and exciting, and even the annoying curmudgeon on the team is bearable. Why doesn't he realize how awesome this place is?

...but then it declines.
Time goes on. It's been six months since you've gotten a new challenge. Your assignments feel rote and while you do your best to get 'em done, your heart's not in it. You can't believe that you ever thought this emotional, flawed human being that is your boss was perfect. And why won't your direct report stop leaving banana peels on your desk?! Patience? Yeah, that's gone for good.

And then you feel guilt.
"But careers are hard work," you tell yourself! "I made a commitment, and I'm not just going to throw in the towel when things get tough."

Or are you?

Just like realizing the person you thought was "the one" maybe isn't, it's hard to know whether it's time to walk away from a job opportunity that once seemed so promising. And this can be especially scary when you know it's not as simple as walking out the door, declaring yourself "single" and being handed a replacement job that perfectly suits your needs.

But just as it is frightening, staying in a job where you're truly unhappy, unfulfilled or simply not challenged can be just as detrimental. Just as we deserve a caring, loving partner, we deserve a job that makes us feel like we're contributing to the world in a way that's meaningful to us.

So how do you decide when to stay and when to go?

1) Start paying attention to yourself and your emotions.
Spend a few days in an "out of body" experience at work. What I mean by this is, I want you to monitor yourself and keep track of how you feel and react in the situations you encounter. What emotions fill you up when you wake up in the morning? How does that change as you get ready for work or as you walk into the office? What fluctuations occur throughout the day as you complete certain tasks, interact with certain people or handle certain challenges?

2) Chart your emotions and look for patterns.
Do you feel excited about the work day, but then find yourself falling into a funk when your boss criticizes your work? Do you want to bang your head against the wall when you're asked to do one task, but then feel the stirrings of excitement at the next? It's important for you to identify the source, or sources, of your discomfort and then see what you can attach them to. For example, does your unhappiness primarily revolve around a person or group of people you work with, a process or procedure mandated by your group or company, a task or set of tasks or something else entirely?

3) Stop thinking about your current job for a moment and try to imagine your ideal job. What are you doing in this job? Where are you working? Who are you working with? What emotions do you feel while you're doing this job? Break down your ideal job into discrete components, rather than looking at the job as one holistic piece. Perhaps you're working outside feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin, while teaching children a new skill? Perhaps you're in a high-rise building wearing a sharp suit and being clapped on the back by a teammate after securing a deal.

4) Draw some conclusions. How does your ideal job compare to your current job? Are there a lot of overlaps, but just a few key gaps, or is it mostly the opposite? Are you noticing that your unhappiness is tied to an area of your current job that is more easily changed (like a nasty teammate, a very specific task you don't enjoy) or to something more permanent or pervasive (the company's broader philosophy or approach, the entire job family in which you're working)?

When you can pinpoint the root of your dissatisfaction, you should be able to see whether or not the problem is with an aspect of your job, this specific job or your broader career. If it's one of the first two, the path forward is simpler. Sometimes something as small as an honest conversation with your boss can help remedy the issue, or if you like your company but not your job, perhaps you can talk about an internal transfer that would rejuvenate you. If you dislike your company, but not your job, you at least know it'll be pretty cut and dry to transfer your skills to another role in your field, and provided you can keep up a positive attitude while you're waiting, you can hold on to your job and search for something new while keeping your paycheck.

Of course, sometimes it becomes obvious that you've just outgrown your career, or maybe you realize you were never well-suited for it in the first place (and trust me, this is WAY more common than you know). For me, it became obvious that a career change was necessary when I was so unhappy I prayed to get sick, just so I didn't have to go into work. Couple that draining emotion with the fact that I no longer felt inspired by my field, and it felt like walking through quicksand just to get through the day.

But what do you do if you discover that a career change actually would be beneficial? How do you navigate the waters of trying to figure out what you do want to do, how your skills transfer and how you can break into a field where you potentially have no direct experience?

You probably won't be surprised to hear that my advice is to hire a coach, and I'm not just saying this because I am a coach, but because I credit my own career success to the hours I spent working with coaches (and I still have my own coaches today). Does this mean you can't change careers on your own? Absolutely not. But for me, having a support system, and knowing there was someone out there with expertise that had my back, gave me the confidence, accountability and extra push that I needed to make decisions and take action, even when it scared the living daylights out of me.

A great career coach can help you wade through all of the conflicting emotions spinning through your head. They can help you nail down the framework for a job that will actually align with your strengths, skills, values and preferences. They can be the objective outsider who sees beyond your limitations, who challenges your skewed belief systems and who pushes you to embrace new perspectives and possibilities. They can help you set goals, stick to them and ultimately move you into a new job faster and with less trial and error than you could on your own.

Regardless of the path you choose, know that it is NORMAL to want to change careers, and that realizing that you're ready for something new is a sign of growth, not of being broken. Embrace that change within you and progress onward to discover the new, exciting person you're about to become. Good luck!

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“Gabby, the purpose of this call is to let you know that your role has been eliminated.”

My vice president continued to speak, but that was really the last bit I heard. The sound of my heart pounding inside my chest was deafening. My palms would not stop sweating, despite me repeatedly wiping them against my jeans.

I had just been laid off.

My brain wasn’t sure what to think or what to feel, so instead I thought and felt everything at once. Thrilled. Horrified. Tears. Laughter. Why me? Who else? What now?

“Do you have any questions?”

The voice on the phone broke me from my emotion-filled reverie. I said no. We hung up. A woman from HR waited outside the door.

She handed me an envelope, the word CONFIDENTIAL stamped across it in a never-ending pattern of bold red letters, like those things you see in detective movies when they’re delivering the results of a murder investigation.

It looked so official, so scary. This was really happening to me.

I quickly ripped a bland, white folder from the murder envelope and half-listened to the woman as she explained its contents, telling me I could go home and take off the rest of the week as I processed what had just happened.

That’s when my mental state collapsed. As I walked down the stairs to my desk, a smile reminiscent of The Joker from Batman broke out across my face, and before I could help it, I erupted into a giant, uncontrollable belly laugh.

What the fuck?

I had just lost my job and I literally could not stop laughing. There I was, standing in a cement staircase, clutching a folder outlining my severance package and laughing like a hyena, the sounds reverberating against the walls. Defense mechanism, much?

When I finally composed myself I plastered a solemn, neutral look on my face, walked over to my desk and mimed to my buddy, Olivia, sliding a single finger across my jugular. That was crass, probably, but I couldn’t bring myself to speak the words. It would continue to make this ridiculous moment real.

Next thing I knew, I was surrounded by concerned co-workers. Most of them didn’t know how to react, so I got a lot of hugs, a lot of sad stares. One woman came up to me and cried, and somehow I found myself consoling HER – reassuring her that I was fine, that this was a good thing and that I was happy.

Of course, that was true, at least to an extent. I had been miserable in my job for months. In fact, the job had been wrong from the very start, and I had known it quite quickly. Yet something within me had told me to hold on, to hope and believe that things would get better, that my role would become more challenging and fulfilling, that the organization would get its act together.

In spite of the fact that I routinely prayed to get sick, just so I wouldn’t have to go to work (a truly bad sign!), I was blinded by an amazing paycheck, four weeks of vacation, unlimited sick days and perks upon perks. And perhaps worst of all, something in me had believed that there wasn’t anything better out there; that at 31 years old, this was the best it was going to get.

The day that I was laid off, I was one of 30 Associates that got the boot as a result of a massive reorganization of the marketing department. And the decision rocked everyone involved, even those that remained. The silent tension that filled our "cool" open floor plan was so thick that even my annoying ping-pong playing colleagues took a break from their daily festivities to mourn.

If you had asked me a few years ago if I ever thought I'd be laid off, I would probably have shrugged in an attempt to appear modest, but in my brain, I was pretty firm in my conviction that it wouldn't happen to me. After all, I was a Harvard educated marketer with work experience at one of the world's most loved brands. I was a diligent employee with excellent presentation skills, the ability to manage others and a sharp, strategic brain. In my past jobs, I was consistently one of the strongest and most liked performers on the floor. These are not the types of people that get laid off...right?

Maybe.

So many of the people that were laid off were brilliant. Nearly all had fantastic education. Few were your typical slackers or people that intentionally ruffled feathers. But what did distinguish us from the group that remained was our individuality. We weren't the cookie cutter workers that fit nicely into a mold. We spoke up when we didn't agree. We took an approach to solving problems that was a bit different. Our personalities didn't align completely with the person the company wanted us to be. It was a sad, yet not entirely shocking realization that even among a company that preached innovation, homogeneity was actually a value they prized.

Coming to this conclusion was comforting to my ego, particularly as I started to pack my possessions into my purse, getting ready to leave for the day. This was the first of many days to come during my "transition" period where I'd awkwardly try to carry arms full of belongings while simultaneously opening doors, as others on the floor diverted their eyes. The fact that I had lost my job made them feel awkward and ignoring me was often the way they dealt.

I never cried. That's just not my way. But I did spend a few days primarily laying in bed, greasy hair tossed into a bun, re-runs of Grey's Anatomy flipping by on Netflix.

And then I got up.

I showered, put on makeup and at 1pm on a Tuesday stepped outside into the sunshine and warmth of an early fall day in Philadelphia. I breathed in the air, felt the sun on my skin, and the emotion that overcame me was one of the most powerful I've felt in my life.

I felt free.

It was the start of something wonderful, and although I didn't know what it would be at the time, I put one foot in front of the other, walked out into the bliss of the empty city streets and never looked back.

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I'm an avid YouTube watcher. It's part of the reason I stopped paying for cable, because frankly, I was watching way more hours of YouTube videos each week than I was of network TV. This made for fascinating scenarios when my friends would talk about the latest episode of Parks & Recreation or Modern Family or whatever, and I'd be like, well Zoella's latest favorites video was just....no one? Just me? Ok.

I mention this because sometimes the channels I subscribe to don't upload fast enough, and it results in me aimlessly trolling my list of recommended videos. It was this very act of trolling that led me to discover LightbyCoco last year. Coco is a minimalist, or as she calls it, someone who ascribes to the principles of "living light." I watched a few of her videos and, this is going to sound totally hippie dippie, but I felt a sort of calling.

When I was a child, I loved to collect things -- stickers, keychains, postcards, Beanie Babies -- but as I've gotten older, I've noticed that all of these "things" started to weigh me down. I found myself going to not one, not two, but THREE grand openings of The Container Store and relishing all of their amazing storage solutions, only to realize that the way I was approaching organizing was just finding creative ways to hide my excess shit, which at the end of the day, meant I still owned way too much stuff.

I really started to notice just how much I had amassed when I moved to Philadelphia and went from a 1,100 square foot Florida apartment with 1.5 baths, a walk-in closet, coat closet, linen closet, pantry and about 15 cabinets and cupboards to a 700 square foot box with less than half the storage. When I moved I found that every single nook and cranny where I could possibly hide a "thing" was quickly full, and maybe for some people that works, but for me, it just made me stressed.

My best friend doesn't understand this, because in her world, as long as everything has a place she's cool, but I was consistently reminded of how full every space was and it weighed me down mentally. When I watched Coco's minimalist house tour or capsule wardrobe, the idea really resonated with me, and so I started decluttering.

This was months before Marie Kondo's now famous book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up came into fashion. By the time that book caught fire, I had already made four trips to Goodwill with full carloads of stuff I no longer wanted or needed. I started calling myself a minimalist.

And then this happened:

I was on a girls' trip to New York City with three of my best friends from high school, and naturally because it's a topic that inspires me, I started talking about my journey to minimalism and how it had begun to change my life. And one of my friends called me out. She took one look at my weekend makeup bag, which was filled with probably 12 products and said, "Umm, look at that," (pointing to the bag), "You're no minimalist."

And that's when I realized just how misunderstood minimalism was. Sure, if you're going by the traditional definition from the dictionary, minimalism is the art of "extreme" spareness and simplicity. But in reality, 1) minimalism need not be extreme if that doesn't work for you, and 2) you make your own rules!

The root of the minimalism movement is in the concept of keeping items and possessions that have a purpose. I think Marie Kondo's principle of things "sparking joy" takes it a bit far, because my whisk in my kitchen rarely sparks joy, but rather it has a use, and I frequently take it out of its drawer to stir up baking mixes or scramble my eggs. This is in contrast to the three pairs of kitchen tongs that I owned at the beginning of my journey or the "spare" coffee maker that I kept in my hall closet "just in case my Keurig ever breaks."

Let's face it, if my Keurig ever breaks, am I going to whip out the 3-year-old KitchenAid or am I going to go out and buy another Keurig?

Creating a minimalist home is about evaluating the possessions that add value to your life in one way or another and then surrounding yourself with only those possessions. But YOU get to define what value means and which possessions fall into that category. For me, I love beauty products, and YES, I use 12 products every single day. So having these things in my possession actually supports my minimalism, rather than refuting it. Someone who maintains a makeup bag of 8 items, on the other hand, but only uses 2 of them daily, is actually less of a minimalist than me.

The journey of getting to minimalism is fun and challenging. It sounds hokey, but I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders every time I made a donation or realized I could pass an item along to someone who would enjoy it more than me. I had a party a few months ago, and I put out about 10 items I no longer wanted. I felt more joy in seeing them pass into new hands than I ever would have with those things sitting unused in my drawers. And oh -- giving myself permission to throw away photos that brought up bad memories? That may have been the most cathartic decluttering session of them all.

As I just moved into an even smaller apartment, minimalism has been on my mind again, and I continue to go through my belongings and pull out things I can pass along. Those old chargers, plates and napkins that I had on my tiny kitchen table? I realized that because they're old, sort of faded and chipped that every time I looked at them, I felt a knot in my stomach. I got rid of them. And frankly, I kind of liked the look of the bare table more, because it showed off the wood grain and shifted the focus to the beautiful, cream-colored chairs that flanked it. Those gorgeous pillows on my couch that are crazy uncomfortable because the ends of the feathers stick into your back every time you try to lay on them? Those went too, to a household where "show" pillows are necessary and comfort doesn't matter.

I still have two trunks full of stuff from my childhood that I'm not ready to let go of. Old yearbooks, my baby blanket, a few stuffed animals, my grandfather's Gator hat. I still have 10 nail polishes (down from 40!) and 10 coffee mugs (all varieties of nerdy!). But these items are additive to my life, rather than subtractive, so minimalism is still achieved for me.

You might be wondering what in the heck any of this has to do with careers, and I'll admit that the relationship is tangential. But I think the moral of the story is that surrounding yourself with things, experiences, people and the like that ADD to your life can be massively powerful. And along those same lines, removing the things that DETRACT from your life can be even more so.

What might happen if you cleared off your desk at work today? What if you removed those piles of papers you've been meaning to attend to (but never find the time to look at)? I challenge you to clear away the useless office supplies that you reach for once every six months (like tape! Who really needs tape on their desk?). Think about what might happen if you replace your twelve knick knacks with two framed photos of loved ones that remind you of serene, peaceful or truly happy moments? How would you feel if you kept out the one award that's most meaningful to you and hid those that don't make you feel proud?

You can choose to apply the principles of minimalism to anything in your life, really, from the physical space around you to the mental chatter that clutters your thoughts and inhibits focus. Apply it to your email inbox (Hi Christine!) or streamline your notes by using a single notebook. Maybe create a work "uniform" that helps you get dressed in the morning with ease. Do whatever feels right to you and go slow. Make small changes that you try out for a few weeks to see how you feel.

I know for me, both the journey and the end result have proven to be powerful in shifting not only my mindset, but my finances (I buy less and am more careful about what I do buy). I'm significantly more relaxed, and instead of looking out into my space and seeing stress and clutter, I see peace. It's been transformational.

Now it's your turn. Have you heard of minimalism, and do you think it's absolutely nuts? Have you tried it and loved it, too? What are your best tips for helping others achieve minimalism in their life or work? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below.

SURVIVING MY LAYOFF

CENTER STAGE: HUMAN RIGHTS ACTIVIST, AMY OYEKUNLE

BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO

GETTING LAID OFF

THE FREEDOM OF MINIMALISM

LET'S STAY IN TOUCH!

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